Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot
Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot is the 20th episode of season 4. It aired on April 16, 2007. Summary Judith's and Herb's wedding is taking place soon, and Alan is looking forward to it; Charlie and Herb's sister, Myra, continue their relationship. Also, Jake repeatedly gets his tuxedo dirty. Plot Alan's dream of freedom is about to come true now his ex Judith is getting remarried to Herb. He worries that Charlie, who is having sex with Herb's sister, Myra, will somehow ruin it for him again. Getting Jake prepared for the ceremony is just a dirty routine problem. Charlie stands in for the sick relative who was to walk bridesmaid Myra to the altar, just to infuriate Judith. He's after some fun but gets a bitter aftertaste. Cast *Charlie Sheen *Jon Cryer *Angus T. Jones *Marin Hinkle *Conchata Ferrell Quotes *'Alan': What is that? ---- *'Herb': Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you. ---- *'Shannon': Excuse me. Are you Judith's ex-husband? *'Alan': Uh, yeah, yeah, I was just dropping off our son. I'm sorry, do I know you? *'Shannon': Oh, no, not... really, it's...Herb and I were engaged before he met Judith, so... *'Alan': And you're coming to his wedding? *'Shannon': Yeah, well, we're still friends. *'Alan': Oh. Well, how very... California of you. *'Shannon': Well, I wish him the best. *'Alan': Mm. *'Shannon': I have to tell you, though, based on first impressions, I'm not sure that Judith is trading up. *'Alan': Oh. Thank you. (laughs) Uh, and having just met you, I feel safe in saying that Herb's not getting an upgrade, either. *'Shannon': (laughs) *(organ playing) *'Jake': Oh, man! *'Charlie': Nice dress. *'Myra': Bite me. *'Charlie': Okay. Meet me in the coatroom. *'Myra': (Laughs) Listen, after the reception, can you take me to the airport? *'Charlie': You're flying home tonight? *'Myra': Yeah. *'Charlie': I thought we had something going here. *'Myra': We did, and now I'm going home. *'Charlie': Okay. Maybe I can come visit you sometime. *'Myra': Ooh, I don't think my boyfriend would like that very much. *'Charlie': Your boyfriend? *'Myra': He's more like a fiancé. *'Charlie': You're getting married?! *(organ playing "Wedding March") *'Charlie (whispers)': Why didn't you tell me you were engaged? *'Myra': I thought it would be awkward. *'Charlie (loudly)': Awkward?! *'Minister': You may be seated. *'Alan': Mm, ow. We-we really shouldn't be doing this. *'Shannon': Why not? They broke our hearts. *'Alan': Uh, yeah, but I'm kind of over it. *'Shannon': I'm not. *'Alan': Mm, mm, uh, hang on, hang on. Maybe we could go out for coffee first. Or-or a movie. *'Shannon': Alan, this is gonna happen with you or without you. *'Alan': "With me or--" how does that work? *'Minister': The institution of marriage is not one to enter lightly, so we pause at this time to consider the depth of that commitment. *(loud clattering) *'Shannon': Oh, Alan Harper, you animal! *(clattering continues) *'Shannon': Oh, God! Alan Harper! Oh, God! Oh, don't stop, Alan Harper! Please don't stop! Oh, Alan Harper, I feel like a woman again! *'Alan Harper': I'm Alan Harper, and I'm not having sex! Title quotation from Jake, as he complains about Alan waking up four times to go to the toilet. Category:Episodes Category:Season 4